Monday 25 October 2021

A Permanent Scar






I had been going to a patient's house for over eight months as a carer. My patient was an old woman who needed help with medication and personal care. Her son lived with her. The carers were given strict instructions never to leave her alone. Usually it wasn’t a problem as one of her sons was always present.


Last week however the son left when I came and promised he'll be back within half an hour, which is the length of my visit. Half an hour passed, he didn't come. I got ready to leave but suddenly the woman held my hand and cried, telling me not to leave her alone. I called the office and asked them to contact her son. He responded that he'll be back in 15 mins. I assured the woman but she just stood at the door refusing to let me go. The son came, apologised profusely and explained the reason for his delay. He was sorry for his mom's behaviour too but I said it's ok as I still have time for my next visit. This happened again during the week.


Yesterday her son told me the reason behind her terror of being left alone. "We three sons had always known to have happy parents. Mum always made sure the house was In perfect order. We were sent away to boarding school. Whenever we came back from holidays mum would be so happy and she simply wouldn't let us go back. She would cry and plead. We assumed it was her motherly love. Till we grew up. My brother was studying psychology and he insisted that from now on we go to meet our parents without informing them. I found it odd but agreed. So one day we three brothers decided to take leave from college and go meet our parents. The eldest brother had the keys to the house. We reached our house and as we unlocked the door, we saw the horror that our mother had been hiding from us all these years just to keep our childhood normal. My dad was mercilessly beating her with a stick. We rushed in, took mum to a doctor. Dad was too drunk. In the hospital mum cried and told us that he used to hit her only when no one was in the house so that there would be no witnesses. Also, the reason why we were sent away to boarding school. We eventually made mum file for divorce and it's been 5 years that my dad has passed away. But as you can see, the mental scars remain".


I listened with moist eyes. The fear, the terror lives on even after the tormentor dies. That's the cruelty of domestic violence.

1 comment: